The One Where The Beatles Beg For Oral Sex - or - Why does Ringo "talk about boys"

Welcome to Part One of The Beatles remasters series. Since I am predominately a linear thinker, Medicinal Music will be covering The Beatles remasters chronologically (with the exception of the Past Masters singles compilation, which will follow Let It Be).


A lot of music listeners in my generation, when they think of The Beatles, tend to bypass their earlier work. On the surface, this makes sense - their first albums were basically boy-meets-girl, bubble gum pop - a far cry from their dope smoking, acid tripping, innovative albums that were to follow. And on the surface - it's totally understandable. Shit, when you have members of boy bands citing The Beatles as "the original boy band", that's gotta deter people from delving into their earlier work. (For the record, this comparison is utter bullshit for a litany of reasons that I care not to get into right now, but it should be noted that anyone making this comparison should be shot on sight). Please Please Me is a fantastic album debut album that does its best to recapture the raw energy from their legendary early live shows at the Cavern Club and in Hamburg, Germany. In addition to being a great album, when put in context with the cultural norms at the time, Please Please Me is actually quite a subversive album, regardless of its bubble gum pop appearance.

When you look at archived footage of Beatlemania, you've gotta ask yourself - what the hell has got all of these teenage girls screaming like absolute maniacs? It was the the sexual energy that oozes from these songs - similarly to Elvis Presley's hip gyrations almost a decade earlier. Today, when you've got songs with lyrics like "wait til you see my dick", you may think the songs on Please Please Me are pretty tame, but lets take a look at the facts:

Right out the gate, you've got the first line of "I Saw Her Standing There" -

"She was just seventeen/you know what I mean/and the way she looked/was way beyond compare"

Jesus Christ, fellas - no wonder parents were freaking out about their daughters listening to The Beatles. I don't even think that nowadays an artist could get away with such a blatant endorsement of statutory rape on the radio. Fox News would be up in arms if someone like Usher or John Mayer tried to pull that shit. So, kudos gentlemen!

Later in the album, you've got The Beatles ode to oral sex (or, at least their female counterparts not reciprocating oral sex) - "Please Please Me". I know what you're thinking - "Dr. Moshe, you sick fuck. That's not what 'Please Please Me' is about. Get your mind out of the gutter". Ok, that's fine, but lets just look take a look at the lyrics:

Last night I said these words to my girl

I know you never even try, girl

C'mon C'mon C'mon C'mon

Please please me like I please you

You don't need me to show the way, love

Why do I always have to say, love

C'mon C'mon C'mon C'mon

Please please me like I please you

I don't want to sound complaining

But you know there's always rain in my heart

I do all the pleasing with you

It's so hard to reason with you

Oh yeah, why do you make me blue

Last night I said these words to my girl

I know you never even try, girl

C'mon C'mon C'mon C'mon

Please please me like I please you

So am I really that out of line? To me, that sounds a lot like a guy complaining that his girl won't go down on him. Or, maybe I'm wrong.

But enough about those pervy lads from Liverpool (I'll skip over my wondering about lyrics like 'my baby's got me locked up in chains' or why Ringo is so enthusiastically singing about 'boys'), and lets talk about these remasters. As mentioned in my previous post, Please Please Me is available both in the original mono mix and a stereo mix. Regardless of the version you listen to, you will be impressed with improved sound quality, but the original mono mix is the way to go for Please Please Me.

The mono mix has a much fuller sound, which does a better job of achieving the recreation of their the energy and excitement of their live performances. You'll be blown away Lennon's vocals and Ringo's drumming on "Twist and Shout". The remasters also give new life to McCartney's bass playing. Whether a fast bassline, like on "I Saw Her Standing There", or a more melodic bassline, like on "Do You Want To Know A Secret", these remasters resurrect the low-end on these recordings, providing a pretty serious punch that was lacking on the lifeless 1987 CDs.

That being said, the stereo mixes are pretty interesting in its own right. While the sound separation gives the songs a more sparse sound (which is especially noticeable when listening with headphones), the stereo mix allows listeners to focus on specific instrumentation. It gives you a little more of an appreciation of the individual contributions by the band members and how each part works as a whole. The stereo separation isn't as noticeable when listening on a home stereo or a car, but you'll definitely hear the difference with headphones on.

To wrap up this post (which I will do with each of these posts), below are some of the highlights from these remasters - mostly specific sound clarity improvements:

File Under: Where The Fuck Did That Come From?

- Paul's bass on "I Saw Her Standing There"

- The echo effect on the opening lines of "Misery" sounds amazing

- Being able to actually hear anything beyond John's blistering vocals and Ringo's drumming on "Twist and Shout"

- Paul's melodic bass on "Do You Want To Know A Secret" (Paul's bass is going to be a reoccurring theme throughout all of these entries - these remasters really do his playing justice)